Article archive

Are you Alex James?

01/09/2011 22:00
If you're Alex James, part time bass player with Blur, then you'll lamely quip how you've "exchanged hard drugs for soft cheese!" every time you pop up to plug your dairy produce/TV-show/shit newspaper column. There is only one way to be sure though: complete this issue's Fig...

'Would Like To Meet' team suggest Merrick "tries an eighties flange"

01/09/2011 20:36
In the revamped series of the BBC show 'Would Like To Meet', hosts Lowri Turner and Tracey Cox have suggested that neurofibromatosis sufferer/Victorian curiousity John Merrick should "try an eighties 'flange' haircut". Grotesque, disturbing, but ultimately sympathetic. Yet...

Dawkins' grandchildren boycott pre-school nativity concert.

01/09/2011 15:11
The Grandchildren of Richard Dawkins, the evolutionary biologist, outspoken atheist, secular humanist and popular science writer, are refusing to appear in their playgroup's nativity play. Dawkins and his grandchildren(right) make their feelings clear outside the entrance...

Ask James Brown: Careers advice from the hardest working man in showbusiness

01/09/2011 15:06
It the first of his career workshops, the Godfather of Soul helps a young marketing professional handle a departmental reorganisation. Dear James, I work for a large company that is undertaking a reorganisation. We have just started the 90-day consultation process and received confirmation...

Are you a crab?

01/09/2011 10:47
Crabs are arguably the United Kingdom's favourite crustaceans, despite being scavengers that live off dead fish. Could you be one? Complete this issue's Fig Questionnaire and find out. Land crabs make excellent household pets, and can always be consumed (or simply thrown...

Are you in the Taliban?

01/09/2011 00:00
If you're a bearded misogynist bent on enforcing the most brutal interpretation of Sharia law that the world has ever seen, then you might be a member of the Taliban. Find out in this issue's questionnaire.   1.Whilst carrying out her household chores, your catch your wife humming an...

ABBA to reform as BABA

11/08/2011 12:12
Eurovision winning pop superstars ABBA will make a historic return to the charts thirty years after their last UK hit, only this time, founding member Bjorn Ulvaeus has said that the group will be known as 'BABA'. Benny, Agnetha, the other one and Bjorn. Now a...
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